Thursday, July 30, 2015

7/30/15 – Week 1: Evan, Now On Demand

Wearing his "I Love My Mommies" onesie!

Thursday 7/30/15 – Evan is a week old! I can't believe it. A week ago this morning, he was still inside me. And weighed more than now. He's so long and adorable. I don't know how he ever fit in there.  Those long legs.  When he was born at 22” long, he was in the 100th percentile for height.  Our tall boy!

I feel so much love for this little boy. He is perfect. And he is ours.

Friday 7/31/15 – We had the tongue tie procedure done this morning.  The worst part was walking from the parking garage to the doctor’s office.  I’m still in a lot of pain.  It feels like my organs are still settling with all the room they now have.  I felt lots of pain sitting in the car again.  All bumps were murder.  And don’t get me started on the speed bumps in the parking garage.  Ouch. #$&%

The procedure was quick and the doctor did it while Evan was still in his car seat.  He used scissors and just snipped the skin under his tongue and then I was able to breast feed him right after.  He cried and there was a little bleeding but then it was over and he won’t remember any of this.  

But we will!  I hate seeing him upset. I feel this instinct to rush to him and kill anyone who is hurting him!

Hopefully having this procedure done will help my pain while breast feeding.  I want to try and breast feed him as long as possible, but the pain is really bad and having cracked and bleeding nipples is no fun, trust me.  This should help him be able to extend his tongue farther and get the milk more efficiently.

Tonight was our first night without a doula staying with us, and Evan decided to cluster feed.  He fed every 1-2 hours and we basically got zero sleep.  Please tell me it won’t be like this forever…

"It won't, Mommy! I love you!"

Saturday 8/1/15 - Tonight the doula brought a scale she uses for home births and weighed Evan. He is about 8 pounds, 4 ounces! His birth weight was 8 pounds, 5 ounces so thank god he is gaining.  On Tuesday we have an appointment with the pediatrician and they will make sure he has gained enough weight back. Fingers crossed.
Monday 8/3/15 – Big update today: I can finally blow my nose a little and it doesn't hurt too much to laugh.  Trust me, this is EPIC news.

Tuesday 8/4/15 – We saw the pediatrician today and Evan is 8 pounds, 5 ounces!  We can start on demand feeding.  So instead of him eating every 2 hours, we can feed him whenever he wants!  So that might be anywhere from every 2-4 hours.  This is such big news because obviously he is gaining weight and is on the right track, but when he eats every 2 hours and it takes 1 hour to feed him, that means we have exactly one hour to eat breakfast, sleep, pee, etc.

The doctor also said we can start giving him bottles.  I can pump breast milk and store it in the refrigerator or freezer and then put it in bottles so Julia can feed him. This will be nice bonding time for them.

Wednesday 8/5/15 – Last night we slept for five hours, woke up, fed him and then slept three hours. Thank you on demand feeding!

Today I finally got my sandwich.  After having the c-section, I wasn’t up for having this sandwich in the hospital.  I didn’t want to have it until I was ready to appreciate it.  Well, today was that day.

Fat Sal's Irresistible Italiano Sandwich
Ruffles Sour Cream and Cheddar Potato Chips
Coca Cola Soda!!!

Friday, July 24, 2015

7/23/15 – Week 0: If You Can’t Take Care Of Yourself, How The Hell You Gonna Take Care Of Somebody Else?

Thursday 7/23/15 - Our baby boy Evan Charles is born!

Friday 7/24/15 – This morning they took my catheter out and I could get up and walk to the bathroom and finally EAT SOMETHING!  The hospital menu was pretty good and I could get anything I wanted.  I also got pain killers…. YES PLEASE.  The worse pain is actually in my shoulders, neck and arms from shaking during the c-section surgery. 

Saturday 7/25/15 – It’s getting easier to get up and go to the bathroom. Working on breast feeding and Evan latched perfectly in the afternoon and has since then. We are both getting the hang of this!

They let me take a SHOWER today!  Trust me this was the most amazing news in the world.  I felt like a million bucks afterwards.  The doctors said my incision looks great.

Our boy is absolutely perfect.  Every time the pediatricians come in to check him, he’s passing all tests. They say we will go home tomorrow.

We are so in love.  I look at him and can’t believe he grew inside me.  He’s amazing.

Sunday 7/26/15 – After a night of very minimal sleep because nurses came in to do newborn testing on Evan, I felt completely unprepared to go home today. I can't take care of myself, how do I care for this baby?

We had a final visit with pediatrics and I felt dizzy walking there, which was just across the hallway.
But it was time to go.  

We went downstairs (me being pushed in a wheelchair while holding Evan) and we got our car seat out from the car.  In the parking garage waiting area, we tried putting Evan in the car seat and because of a lack of sleep and emotions running high, we had absolutely no idea what we were doing.  The straps weren’t long enough since he was taller than we expected.  We couldn’t get him in the car seat.  So we got wheeled back up to the maternity ward and had the nurses help us. 

Finally he was in the car seat and fast asleep in our car. 

On the ride home I sat in the back seat to be with Evan.  It was so painful.  Beyond painful.  Every bump, every turn, every movement hurt my incision.  I couldn’t get comfortable.  Julia drove so slowly but it didn’t matter.  Thank god Evan slept the whole time and didn’t notice anything that was going on. 

Once we were home, there was nowhere I could sit and be comfortable.  My bed didn’t have guardrails that I had gotten used to and our sofa was too low to the ground.  I felt overwhelmed.  I wanted to go back to the hospital. 

From all the fluids they gave me during labor because of the epidural, my legs and feet swelled so much I could hardly walk.  Of course the best way to move the fluid around was to walk, but there was so much fluid at my ankles that it pinched my skin when I stood up. 

Today my breast milk started the transition from colostrum to breast milk.  This involved a lot of pain because they were engorged and Evan had trouble latching.  We had a doula come over tonight and she said in the first 3-7 days of the baby’s life, the milk will transition.  Once the transition is complete, the pain and swelling will go down.  Until then, I'm using warm washcloths to try and alleviate the pain. 

Tuesday 7/28/15 – I’m starting to feel better and feedings are going better. I don’t need to use a warm washcloth every time.  We went to the pediatrician today and Evan lost 10% of his body weight.  That is normal in the first days of the baby’s life because of the milk transitioning.  So by his 2 week check up, he needs to have gained it back.  That is the goal.  Everything else was perfect.

We also have to be on the look out for a “mustard yellow” color poopy diaper by Friday morning.  If we don’t have that, he might not be getting enough milk.  Like there wasn’t pressure already!  All we are talking about now are his diapers and my boobs.  This has become our life.  High alert diaper duty begins now.  We are also tracking everything around the clock with alarms. From feedings every 2 hours to my motrin and narcotics, this is our situation:

Wednesday 7/29/15 – My boobs don’t hurt as much but my nipples are cracked and starting to bleed.  This is starting to get painful.  Our doula thinks Evan has a tongue tie that we should get corrected.  The small piece of skin under the tongue can be snipped (there is little to no feeling there) and that will allow him to latch better while breast feeding.  We made an appointment for Friday. Stay tuned.

"You wanna snip what now?!"

Thursday, July 23, 2015

7/23/15 – My Birth Story

Update: Sorry I’ve been MIA since July, but I HAD A BABY!  He’s so perfect and I have many things to catch you up on.  I’ve been taking notes about everything going on and will post updates when I can.
Xoxo, Mommy Kayt

When I got the epidural I was only at 2 cm and 70% effaced (which seemed impossible since I was in so much pain and felt tons of pressure).  But the nurses all said to get it now because I could progress quickly and might have to wait to get it because they had scheduled c-sections taking place soon.  I realized that I didn't want to be writhing in pain when they have a very long needle near my spine and I have to stay completely still!

Before and after the epidural, our baby’s heartbeat would go into a lull on the monitor.  He would “get sleepy” they said and it wouldn’t spike up and down like they wanted to see.  So I got sugar water and wore an oxygen mask and would turn from side to side every now and then to wake him up.  He loved the oxygen so that seemed to be doing the trick, although I hated wearing the mask.

The doctors came in to let me know some options since I was only at 2 cm.  There was a foley bulb that they could put in right at my cervix and then inflate the balloon part to open it up and help dilate me.  

This could only take me as far as 4 cm.  I thought this was a great first step before taking any more induction drugs.  But after letting me know about this option, the doctor said that my contractions look great and that we could wait 4 hours to see how my body progresses naturally.

Ok!!!  That sounds good to me!

A few hours go by and they come in to check me. 
I'm now 3-4 cm dilated and 100% effaced with a very soft cervix. Since the foley bulb would have brought me to 4cm, we now didn't need that!

I swore they would now say it’s time for Pitocin (an induction drug that sends you into labor with really tough contractions), but they said I was doing great on my own.  Let’s check me again in 4 hours!

Well only 3 hours later they came in because the nurse thought my water had broken.  I thought I had felt something, but it wasn’t a gush or anything like that.  We later discovered that my water had broken at this point, but only partially.  Some trickled out and the baby came down a little and acted like a cork to stop the rest of the water. 

I almost told the doctor not to bother since she came in before the 4 hour mark. 

So when she said to me, “You’re complete!” 
I said, “What???”
She said, “You’re 10 cm!  And I could feel the baby's hair!  Time to start pushing!”

What?!?! He has hair?!!
And how did that happen so fast!!!

I couldn’t believe it.

And then I started crying.  The nurse had just estimated about an hour ago that we might have a late night or early morning birth.  It was only 6:00pm and I wasn’t ready for this! We were about to play monopoly!

Everything moved so fast and my body did all this work by itself!

I suddenly was scared and nervous.

This was it.

I would soon be meeting my son and it all felt like a dream.

So I started pushing.

The nurse went over some techniques, and the best one we tried involved me grabbing a sheet that was tied around the waist of the nurse.  She would use her weight to stabilize herself and I would pull that sheet and push with everything I had.  Because of the epidural, it did feel weird pushing when you are numb from the place you have to push from!

I figured out my breathing pattern and the nurses and doctors really helped guide me so I didn't push too much (that’s when you can end up tearing) and they helped hold my legs along with Julia and Devon, our doula.

I got so hot and kept sweating and was on the verge of having a fever.  Devon kept putting cold washcloths on me and after a few seconds, they would be burning up. 

They noticed that Blackbird’s heart rate would drop during each contraction.  They said as long as he recovered after each contraction, I could continue laboring.  It was possible he had the cord wrapped around him and it was being compressed during the contractions.  The doctors had me start pushing on every other contraction so I could give him a rest and not stress him out.

After 3.5 hours of intense pushing, his heart rate was still dropping during the contractions and they didn't want me to go on doing this for much longer. It just wasn't good for him.

They were now checking to see how far down his head was in the birth canal.  Remember, this is the calculation that starts in negative numbers and once you hit +5, the baby is out. 

He had been at +1 and after 3.5 hours of pushing, he was only at +2. He wasn’t moving down and had been at +2 for a while now.

We were running out of options.

The doctor said we could:
1 = Do a c-section right now, especially if I was exhausted and didn’t want to labor anymore.

I looked at her and immediately said, “NO!”

2 = Try a vacuum.  But they would only let me do a few pushes with the vacuum and if that didn’t work, we would have to do a c-section.

The last thing I wanted was a c-section, so we opted for the vacuum.  Of course there are risks involved with this that you don’t want to think about as they are using a hand pump vacuum to try and pull your child’s skull down and out of your body…. But those risks are so minimal and we needed to give this our best shot.

Despite the epidural, it hurt so much when they put the vacuum in.  I felt so much pressure.

I did 2 full pushes with the vacuum (each push was comprised of 3 deep breaths and pushes in a row).  

I pushed for my life.

The last thing I ever wanted was a c-section.

After those pushes, the doctors checked my progress.
He was still at +2. 
He hadn’t moved at all.
I tried so hard.

We had run out of options.
It was time to do what's best for the baby and for me.
He had to come out now.
C-section it was.

All the doctors and nurses told me they have seen people push who think they are pushing and they really weren't doing anything. They said I was pushing perfectly. I pushed from the right spot and was really bearing down and giving each push everything I had. I said after all, I'm from Philly!

Our boy just didn’t want to come out and we didn’t have a choice anymore.

So now I really started crying. The nurses and doctors went to prep the operating room and gave us a few minutes to ourselves.

This was not the plan. 
It wasn't supposed to be like this. 
Hell, during the c-section portion of the labor and delivery class, I took my bathroom break!  
I thought, “Nope, don’t need this info!” 
I can't handle change unless it's change I'm creating!!! 
But the most important thing was our baby boy. He needed to come out. It was time.

Julia gave me a kiss and I just couldn't believe this was happening. My whole body started shaking. They said it was from the hormones.  When a lot of women give birth, they start shaking and I had just labored for over three hours and had a lot of the same hormones being released.

They wheeled me back to the operating room and transferred me to another bed for the surgery.

The anesthesiologists came in and gave me more drugs through the epidural so I was now numb from the chest down, not just the waist down. I got anti-nausea drugs and kept telling them throughout the surgery when I felt nauseous so they could give me more.

Once they made sure I was completely numb, Julia came back in the room.  She had a gown on and sat right next to me.

My hands rested on these planks that came out from the sides of the bed and I still couldn't stop shaking.  I was now violently shaking my arms and shoulders because they were the only things not numb.

I started feeling pressure.
Lots of it.
It felt so weird.

The anesthesiologist stayed by my head and he talked me through the surgery to warn me when to expect pressure or if our boy was close to being born.

Julia was reassuring me and being so strong and supportive.  I was so drugged now I was becoming exhausted but still couldn't stop shaking.

Then they said he was close to coming out.

I felt tons of pressure...
And then our son was born. After a little while I finally heard a tiny cry. 
He was here.

Julia went over to see him while the doctors worked on taking care of me.
It turns out there was no cord wrapped around him.  But there was a lot of meconium, which is actually the baby’s first poop.  Some babies end up pooping in utero.  It’s not very common, but can happen when babies stay in past their due date. 

I found out later that when Julia walked over to see him, they had cleaned off a large amount of the meconium from him.  The doctors were careful not to stimulate him too much so he would cry because he could have inhaled it, which would have been very dangerous and landed him straight in the NICU. 

Luckily, our boy was fine.

The nurse let Julia know that the placenta had an extra lobe and part of it was calcified.  Calcification happens when the placenta is used up and isn’t needed as much, like when the baby is overdue.  The nurse also said that the umbilical cord was lumpy and wasn’t in the middle of the placenta.  It was more on the side.  Based on all of these things, they suggested we send it to pathology to be analyzed and not give it to our doula for placenta encapsulation.  

I had been looking forward to getting the placenta encapsulated so I can get a lot of the hormones back into my body.  It can help with postpartum depression.  I also figured it couldn’t hurt since we are the only mammals who don’t ingest the placenta after birth.  Sounds weird, but it made sense to me.

Update: We got the final lab results and the placenta was fine. Our doctor reassured us that if anything was wrong with it, our baby wouldn’t have gone to full term.  He would have been small and would have ended up in the NICU after birth.

But none of this mattered when I heard my son cry and knew he was here.

We were mommies. Finally.

I could hear Julia talking to him. It made me feel so good since I couldn't be there to see him right away.

She was incredible.
And he definitely was soothed by her voice. He knew who she was.

She brought him over to me all wrapped in a swaddle.
Our boy was gorgeous.
Absolutely perfect.
I couldn't believe we had a son and he grew inside of me. It was all so amazing.

Julia sat next to me holding him and talking to him while they stitched me up. It took a long time because they were so meticulous. Which I appreciate now but at the time I just wanted this part to be over. I was still violently shaking and would lose feeling in my right arm every few minutes when the blood pressure cuff went off.  I started falling asleep for 20 seconds and then would wake up nauseous. They said this was from the drugs and the fact that I had already been in labor.  They said all of the hormones being released would make me exhausted.

Finally they were finishing with the surgery and Julia went to tell our doula the great news.
Our son was born.
Evan Charles.
Born at 10:35pm.  8 pounds, 5.5 ounces and 22” long.

The nurses and the doctor who delivered him came over to me and they said that everything went perfectly. The incision was small and based on his head size and my pelvic bones, he never would have fit through the birth canal. There was nothing more I could have done.  This definitely made me feel better knowing that we did what we had to do.

They moved me onto a new bed with wheels and covered my arms so I could get warm.
They placed Evan in my arms and we wheeled down to the recovery room where Julia was waiting.

I looked at my son as we went down the hallway. 
His sweet, adorable, perfect little face with big cheeks. I told him that I love him and he looked at me and recognized my voice.

The tears started rolling down my face.

This was it. I was a mommy.

7/23/15 - Epi-Durable

Thank god for drugs.

My contractions were no joke, I was in tears and clearly not having fun anymore. So it was time. Time for my friend, Epidural to pay me a visit.

I was terrified of this procedure. I couldn't stop thinking that I would move at the wrong time and be PARALYZED FOR LIFE!

Julia and our doula, Devon left the room so I could concentrate and be completely in the zone. The anesthesiologist was amazing and she talked me through every step of the way along with the help of our amazing nurse.

I was so surprised that it didn't hurt nearly as much as I thought it would. I was slouched over on the bed and dripping with sweat I was so nervous!
And then it was done! I did it!!!

Soon I started feeling relief and now my legs are numb but I can still feel them. I feel some contractions but not nearly as much as earlier. Drugs work!!!

Luckily I'm still progressing in my labor and am having tons of contractions. Bonus is that I can't really feel them. And if I do, I just press this nifty button and boom!

In 15 minutes I'm on cloud nine again!

I'll get checked again soon and we will see how to progress. Everyone here is letting me try to labor naturally as much as possible before pumping me full of pitocin and other induction drugs.

We are in good hands and they even let me eat a Popsicle!

7/23/15 - Like I Just Said

I'm having A LOT of contractions.

I'm the third one down.

I've got more humps than camels in the desert!

The chicks in the other rooms don't know what's coming for them...

7/23/15 - It's Not Delivery, It's Deliver-AHHHHH!

We checked into the hospital last night and it's 7:30am now and I'm definitely feeling these contractions!

I was given Cervidil which is like a mini tampon that sits on the cervix for 12 hours to help it open. Let me tell you it's working because I feel so much pressure and swelling. When I walk around I feel like this baby is gonna fall right out!

I was monitored throughout the night every two hours to see how our boy is doing. Sometimes he liked to evade the heart rate monitor but overall he's doing great.

And I'm having contractions.
Lots of them.
And they hurt.
Things are definitely progressing.

The Cervidil will come out around 10am and the doctors will evaluate how I'm doing and we will take everything from there.

I think we will have a little boy today!

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

7/22/15 - Dear Blackbird, Part 6

My dearest son,

At 41 weeks pregnant, it's time for you to come out and meet your mommies. Especially because your mommy can barely walk and your mama is on edge waiting for me to go into labor!

Tonight we will all go to the hospital and they will give you some incentives to come on out. I have a feeling we will be holding you in a matter of hours.

Which is pretty crazy.
I remember months and months ago laying on the sofa in your room and praying that you were happy and healthy and alive inside of me.

Both of your mommies have worked so hard to bring you into this world. I can't believe this part of the journey we started so long ago is finally coming to an end.  We love you so much already and I tear up thinking about holding you in my arms for the first time.

Everything feels so surreal right now. This is my last full day of being pregnant at home and feeling you move inside me. I know I've been feeling uncomfortable lately, but I'm sure I will miss that.

Soon you will be here and our lives will be changed forever.

We can't wait to meet you, our son.

Monday, July 20, 2015

7/20/15 - Contractions Speak Louder Than Words

We had our appointment this morning for the non-stress test to see how our boy is doing in there.

They measured the amniotic fluid and it was perfect.

They took my blood pressure and it was perfect.

Then they put the bands around my belly to measure his heart rate and my uterus for any possible contractions.

I had been nervous about the fluid level so once we got to the 20 minute monitoring test I was thinking, "What a breeze!"

That is until the monitor started picking up all of these contractions I was having...

I'm at the bottom of the screen (5511F)  and the blue line is his heart rate and green are my contractions.
Every major white line indicates a 4 minute time span.
So...I was having contractions every few minutes!

I could definitely feel my belly get hard all over and some of the contractions were a little painful. Just ask Jules because I was squeezing her hand!

After the monitoring was complete the nurse came in and asked how strong they felt. She said since I could still talk during them, I'm probably in the early stages of labor. Which surprise, surprise can last for days or longer! We need the contractions to get more powerful and then we will be on to something.

She had a doctor come down and see how much I was dilated. 
I'm still at 2cm but now my cervix is soft, which is great. (It had been medium a week or so ago.)

Our boy is finally getting ready to come meet his mommies!

Sunday, July 19, 2015

7/19/15 - Bellywatch 2015

As of this post, I'm still not in labor.
So we decided to get one last decaf latte this morning.

It was delicious!
And it almost looks like the heart has wings and is ready TO LEAVE THE NEST.
Come on, Baby Blackbird!

I never thought we would make it to another bump photo, but we did!
This is definitely the last one since the doctors don't want me to go past 41 weeks.

Alternate photo...

I have another non-stress test in the morning to see how he's doing.

Unless he has other plans between now and then..... !!!

Saturday, July 18, 2015

7/18/15 - Baby Blackbird, Unplugged

Last night, Julia looked up some pressure points in my ankles and feet that help bring on labor.

Then this morning in a rare occurrence, we had a thunderstorm and rain in LA!

Perhaps this combination along with our apparently dramatic little boy (he's our kid after all!) made my mucus plug come out!

Yes, it's as gross as it sounds, but you're obviously reading this because you want to know updates about this baby, so DEAL WITH IT!!!

The mucus plug literally closes the opening of the cervix to protect the baby from bacteria and infection. When the cervix dilates, the plug comes out and... 

What happens next is different for everyone and it could still take hours, days or longer before labor actually begins. But things are happening and that's great news!

I see more foot massages in my future for this evening!

Thursday, July 16, 2015

7/16/15 - 101 Dilations: Part 5

We saw the doctor this morning to discuss some options of how to get this little boy moving along.
He is now fashionably (of course!) late and his mom can barely walk!

First option was to have my membranes stripped. This helps open up the cervix and have your body move closer to going into labor. We decided to do this. The doctor basically uses his fingers to open the cervix... and WOW.

I must have said, "Oh my god" and "Oh my" about a dozen times. 
From another room, I'm sure it sounded like something different was going on!

It was definitely uncomfortable and caused some bleeding, but wasn't nearly as painful as I had feared. When the doctor finally stretched the cervix enough and it opened he said, "I can feel the head." 
I almost fainted. 
I could feel all of this!

But then it was over. He said I had still been only at 1cm somehow. 
That sounds so impossible. 
With how uncomfortable I've been feeling, I thought I had progressed more than that.

Well after the stripping of the membranes and stretching the cervix, I'm now at 2cm! 
8 more to go until we meet this boy!

After all of this stripping was over with, I got a fetal non-stress test done. This was on the labor and delivery floor of the hospital. They start these tests if you go past your due date to make sure the baby is doing ok in there.

First they did an ultrasound to measure the amount of amniotic fluid. 
Our boy fell within the normal range, so he is doing fine swimming around in there.

Then they took my blood pressure which was normal. 

And finally I was laying in a comfy bed with two belts around my belly. These are the same belts I'll have on me when I'm in labor. One measured his heart rate and the other measured my belly for contractions.

The top blue line is his heart rate and the bottom green line is my belly.

I laid like this for 20 minutes and BOOM our boy passed the test! 
Everything looked perfect.

Next step if I don't go into labor is to have another non-stress test done on Monday morning.

And then I would get induced on Wednesday evening. So let's hope the membrane stripping did the trick and I will go into labor naturally, which could happen anytime between this afternoon and next week.

Come on Baby Blackbird!

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

7/15/15 - Week 40: Jackfruit

Today the baby is the size of...

I have no idea what a jackfruit is, so why don't we say that today the baby is the same size as...

"Yeah, enough with the photos - where's my brother?!"

Somehow we made it all the way to Blackbird's due date!
I can't believe I've technically been pregnant for 10 months!!!

But the time has come for this little boy to make his debut.

Even other babies want him to come out!

Josephine says, "Please come out so we can play together!"

So, I've been eating all kinds of labor inducing foods.

Spicy sausage
Spicy eggplant
Spicy bolognese sauce
Spicy peppers

Nothing seems to be working.
And I'm feeling extremely uncomfortable.
It actually feels like my body is slowly being "wishboned" as my pelvis widens for labor.

It's time, Baby Blackbird.
It's time.

We have a doctor's appointment in the morning and will see how that goes.

Please don't make your mommies wait too much longer to meet you!

Sunday, July 12, 2015

7/12/15 - Children's Books

Over the past few months, Julia has enjoyed reading books to our boy through my belly.
Whenever she puts her head close to him and he hears her voice, he starts moving around like crazy!  It is so special to see and I know he can tell she is his mama.

We have been reading Baby Blackbird some of the classics.
That being said, I have a few things to say about three books in particular.

#1 - THE CAT IN THE HAT - By Dr. Seuss

We all remember this book, right?
Well I didn't.  
Of course everyone has heard of it, but just do me a favor and read it again.
You might be shocked by the "lessons" that are taught within these pages...

First of all, these kids are bored out of their minds staring out the window while their mom is NOT home.  Then all of a sudden, The Cat In The Hat comes walking right through the front door!

Why is the door not locked?!
Mom isn't home!
Where is the ALARM SYSTEM?!

How about you say, "Get the f*&% out of our house, you STRANGER!"
Clearly, the FISH is the only sane one in this book.

He's the only one who says the Cat shouldn't be there because MOTHER IS OUT!
Of course the fish is ignored and CHAOS ENSUES.

Just like a frat party, the Cat has some friends that he invites over WITHOUT invitations.

Still no one is listening to the fish who says everyone has GOT TO GO!
So we have MORE CHAOS!

The only time the fish is heard is when he spots MOTHER coming home.
The Cat tries to redeem himself by cleaning everything up and he finally leaves.
Mother walks in and asks what the kids did all day.

"What would you do if your mother asked you?"
I'll tell you what you'll do!
You'll TELL THE F*&%ing TRUTH because your mother asked you a question!
And from now on the door will stay LOCKED and you will listen to your FISH!


This one you might not remember as well.
I hadn't even heard of it.
The book starts out by letting you know there are two kinds of people.

Butter Side Down People, ZOOKS:

And Butter Side Up People, YOOKS:

They have this huge wall that separates them and they HATE each other.
They are constantly battling and making new inventions to try and KILL each other.

The whole time we're reading this, I'm thinking, "Dr. Seuss, you smart little devil!"
He's always writing these great books with amazing hidden morals.
Like this one about how we should ALL GET ALONG even though WE ARE DIFFERENT.
We are all people and we should LOVE EACH OTHER.

In anticipation of this amazing moral, we get towards the end and Grandpa tells his Grandson that he has one last invention for the butter battle.

He's holding a small red ball.
I'm thinking, "That is an oddly shaped HUG."

He gets on top of the wall and meets the other guy who also has a small red ball.

Suddenly, we are on the last page of the book and I'm thinking, "Maybe these are JELLYBEANS!"
Maybe they realize that they both like RED jellybeans and have something in common!
And here comes Dr. Seuss with his amazing moral of the story!

Instead we get this:


Are you f*&%ing kidding me?!
THAT is the moral of the story?!
This damn Cold War book has no ending!
It ends in uncertainty and DEATH.
This one is staying on the shelf for a while...

#3 - THE GIVING TREE - By Shel Silverstein

Oh Shel, what great books you write.
Or do you...
I was excited to read this one again with thoughts of instilling in my son the great life lesson of GIVING.

We start out with the little boy loving his tree and swinging from her branches and eating her apples and playing games with her.

He even CARVED his initials in the tree because he loved her so much.

And "the tree was happy". 
Quote, unquote.
Ok, at this point I'm thinking, alright Baby Blackbird, we don't CARVE things into trees, but I'm still into this book.
So, we keep reading.

The boy grows older and this little punk thinks it's cool to carve MORE things into the tree!

He goes to the tree and the tree tells him how much she LOVES him and asks him to PLAY and SWING from her branches because she's missed him.

All he can say is that he's too big to climb and play and he needs MONEY.
The tree tells him to take her apples and sell them at the market.

So he climbs up and takes all of the apples and NEVER SAYS THANK YOU.

Strike one, Shel.
Strike one.

Time passes and the teenager is now a man and he DOESN'T visit the tree and the tree is sad.
Oh, but he makes sure to come back when he NEEDS something from her.
He says he needs a house and the tree offers all of her branches to the man so he can build a house.

This son of a b*tch takes all of her branches and runs off to build a house for his wife and NEVER SAYS THANK YOU.

Strike two, Shel.
Strike two.

More time passes and the man is now an old man.  
He doesn't give a f*ck about the tree for decades and then returns once again WHEN IN NEED.
The tree is so happy to see him and all he can think of saying is I NEED, I NEED, I NEED.
Now he wants a boat to take him far away.

Finally we got something right here.
Get this jerk outta here!

The tree selflessly tells him to CUT HER DOWN so he can make a boat.

And that's exactly what he does as he RUNS AWAY with the ENTIRE tree and NEVER SAYS THANK YOU.

"And the tree was happy... but not really."
Well, no shit, Shel.
The tree is practically DEAD.
Of course she isn't happy!

Well more time passes and this prick has the gall to come back AGAIN to see the tree.
The tree tells him she has NOTHING LEFT.

Now I'm thinking, finally this jerk will thank the tree for everything she has given him over the years.


The old man says he doesn't need much but DOES NEED SOMETHING.
A place to sit his old, tired ass down.

The tree is so happy to be useful again that she straightens up her stump and gives him a place to sit down.

And once again, he NEVER SAYS THANK YOU.

Strike three, Shel.
Strike three.

Supposedly the "tree was happy", but I'm not buying it.
That poor f*&%ing tree just GIVES GIVES GIVES and all that grown ass man can do is TAKE TAKE TAKE and never even say thank you?
And that's the END of the book.

Are you kidding me?
At the end, the tree should have said, "Sure, come and sit on my stump, i.e. all that's left of me because you took everything else.  In the decades since you've last given a shit about me, I have become a home to a nice family of FIRE ANTS.  Have a seat you prick and they will bite your ass up, you ungrateful dick!"

This book doesn't teach our son about saying PLEASE and THANK YOU and certainly isn't a good lesson about the ENVIRONMENT!
We'll file this one on the shelf for a little while too.

In other news, here's your Sunday bump photo!
With the way I'm feeling at this moment, chances are this might be our last one!

Friday, July 10, 2015

7/10/15 - Any Time Now...

Julia and I went out to lunch today and I had another delicious decaf latte!

I was so excited to see the BABY BLACKBIRD shape in my mug!  Julia got a leaf, but I got Baby Blackbird.  
Ok, it might be a turkey, but as far as I'm concerned, it's a plump Blackbird who's ready to meet his mommies!

It's crazy living in each moment right now knowing that any second our lives will change forever.

I'm still feeling ok and slightly uncomfortable but I've been hanging in there. Any minute now our baby boy could decide it's time and all of a sudden I'm in labor.

It's exciting that he gets to choose his own birthday. Whenever he feels it's time, he will let me know and BAM I'm in labor and we're grabbing our overnight bags and heading to the hospital.

After lunch we walked around and even walked down towards the beach. I love the ocean so much and it was nice to walk and see the waves. We sat down and I could smell the sand and the salt in the air. I can't wait to take Baby Blackbird to the beach.

Driving back we hit major rush hour traffic and it took us 2 hours to get home. By this point I could barely walk anymore and was now just praying I didn't go into labor in the middle of rush hour so far from home!

As we drove, I put my hands on my belly and thought, "Ok my boy. Whenever you're ready, so am I."
I can do this.
We can do this.
Your mommies are so excited to meet you and hold you and kiss you.
When you're ready, we're here.

Luckily we made it home and we will see if all the walking does the trick. You never know what could happen tonight!

Wednesday, July 8, 2015

7/8/15 - Week 39: Watermelon

Today the baby is the size of...

I can't believe we made it to 39 weeks!
Our little boy won't be growing too much anymore because he's basically run out of room. His brain is still rapidly developing and will continue to do so at a fast pace until he turns 3.

He might have a full head of hair and long fingernails already! We will have to wait and see when he decides he's ready to come out!

This morning, Julia and I were in the living room and we looked outside to see several large BLACKBIRDS land on the other side of our condo roof.
Maybe Baby Blackbird is sending in the troops!

So on that note, we decided to up the ante.
For lunch we went to a restaurant that is known for their "maternity salad".
Apparently there is something in the dressing that has been known to make women go into labor.

THE salad!

Then everything got even better when I was handed a journal to write down my experience with the salad and write how far along I was in my pregnancy.

It was already halfway full of entries for 2015!
Entries like this one:

And then we noticed the SALAD BABIES board!

Will Baby Blackbird have his name added to the board????
We shall see if the salad works!